Posts tagged ‘dream’

Climbing to New Heights

He gave me a young birch tree, about 8 feet tall.  We planted it in the ground next to the house.  That was some time ago.  I thought maybe it was time to check on it.  I saw that it had grown taller than the 2-story house which it was planted beside.  I’d been given some bees and thought the birch would make a good home for them.  I climbed a little more than half way up and settled them into the tree.  They flourished and began busily building their honeycomb.  I could see them in their flurry and the honey began to flow.  I climbed higher so I could watch them from a safe distance.  All the way to the top I climbed, and I felt some wet spots under my hands as I did.  Green spots budding from branches which had been cut once.  Fresh, green, and wet, a bit sticky with sap.  At the top, there were a few of the branches which had been cut when it was a small thing that had grown wider but not budded and still had flat spots from the cut.  I sat down to look around.  I could see the top of the black roof on the white house, a peaceful place.  I could see the leaves on the trees, and now that I’d climbed to the top, the bees were really flourishing. I had climbed all the way up, and at the top I found peace.  My labors were coming to fruition with ease.


When I woke up, I thought about this dream, looked up its symbolism.  The tree with its connections to growth, love, home, protection.  The honeycomb with all the same.  Honey–self explanatory.  I even thought to myself how wonderful it was for the bees to be doing so well at creating their home so fast.  I wanted none of the honey for myself.  And then the connections of the birch to various love goddesses, Venus of course, but also Freya and Brighid, who are goddesses not just of love but of hearth and home.  I checked my card of the day on the tarot app for my phone–it was the High Priestess.  Yes ma’am, I’m listening.  On Friday and Sunday it pulled the Ace of Pentacles, these three cards being the only deviations from pulling cups cards for the past two weeks.  And for two weeks before, I pulled cups alternately with wands, mainly the Page of Wands, but I know who he is.  I know to whom the wands referred.

I guess I know where the cards are leading me, but not really to whom.  That is always hidden from me in the readings and the dreams.  But what is love if not a journey to which we know not the end?

Symbolism resources:


Meeting Death (Dream)

from the night of 12/19/2010

Last night, I met Death.  The details of the dream before I met Death are a bit hazy, but I remember it started out almost sexual.  I would be changing clothes or something, and I’d catch a glimpse of the Reaper in the background, watching me.  As soon as he was noticed, he’d disappear.  Then, one time, I saw him and he did not go away, he just continued to stare at me, into my eyes.  I asked him to leave, and he said no.  I told him it was not my time yet, I was too young.  He said I had made a mistake, and I had failed.  I had nothing left to accomplish, my mistake had ruined it all.  As he spoke, he had moved closer to me, and was now standing a few feet away.  I could see his face.  His skeleton face was actually just a mask, floating in front of his real face.  Now the mask disappeared, and behind it was the face of a friend.  I tried to think what mistake I had made, how I could have altered things in my life so drastically as to completely ruin the course of my destiny.  Then I looked her in the face and told her that I did not believe that anyone was capable of making a mistake that could not be fixed.  She explained that the mistake was not the problem, but my attitude.  I would continue to make this mistake, and so it could not be fixed.  I told her that I could try.  She smiled, and decided to give me another chance.

Then I was standing in front of a sort of wall.  I could see fields and meadows, but it was like in a video game, where it’s just an illusion, and you can’t really walk past the wall.  I could see words at the bottom, and I tried to make sense of it.  I can’t remember all of it, but one of them started with a “Pa” or “Po” (not pandora) and another said Summerland.  She told me it was not a sentence, but the names of different places I could visit.  I chose Summerland.    We flew through the wall, and then we were flying over meadows and a stream.  I could see music and clusters of diminutive fairies, and in the river was an island with a makeshift hut.  The hut seemed to be made of two halves of a thatched roof placed side by side, just a covering as there were no walls.  A small fire burned near it, and there was a hook for holding a pot/cauldron, and the cauldron was on the ground next to it.  Flowers grew in random patches throughout the meadow.  There was a mountain to the left; we were in the valley.  And to the right, over a small hill, was a plain.  Everywhere green grasses grew, the sky was blue with just a few well-placed clouds set into it.  In front of us, but still far away, was a forest.   We hovered briefly to the right of the river, across from the hut.  That’s all I remember of Summerland.  While I was there, I only had the sense of sight–all other senses were absent.  (Perhaps that’s why I could see, but not hear, the music?)

Next, I was going down through a tunnel, and ended up in a house.  I was myself, but I was in another girl’s body, and I had to play her role.  I didn’t really have a choice in her actions, I was simply playing the storyline.  In fact, all the people and scenery in this place really resembled a video game, an older game when graphics were just starting to get good, but still weren’t very realistic.  She had blonde hair, and wore a blue tank top.  (I’m not sure if that’s significant or not, but I’m trying to record all the details I can remember.)  She went to see the boy she liked at his house, but he wasn’t home.  She went to find him, and another girl tried to get in the way, but she didn’t let her get in the way.  When she found him, he was upset about something.  She helped to comfort him, but she still didn’t tell him that she liked him.  He seemed to be bound, something was in his way, and at times, he literally could not move his arms or legs, but was bound and being pushed along.  (I know it sounds strange.  These were actually different scenes, but I’m not sure of the order they came in, or how we got from one to another.)  She freed him from the binds, and it was obvious that they both liked each other, but still, neither spoke of it.  They had a closer friendship, but there was still a distance between them, and the distance was uncomfortable.  Then the girl was bound, and being pushed along, and I was her, and we were in the tunnel.  We finished up back in the house I had started out in, playing the story again.  But this time I had more freedom.  This time, I tried to change things, because I saw how sad they were, but I still couldn’t seem to get things quite right.

And then I woke up.


1/17/2011 — Edit:  I’ve been thinking more about this dream lately, and I tried to find some paintings of “Summerland”.  Instead, I found some photos, and the ones that most resembled my dream were from a trail at Mt. Rainier, in an area that they call Summerland.  I have never been to Washington, and had not heard of the mountain or its Summerland before seeing these pictures.  While they aren’t identical to my dream, they are pretty close.

This one, minus snow:


And especially this one:

Weird Dream

from the night of 12/18/2010

I had a dream…. that was so strange…

There was this guy, I don’t remember his name.  It was kinda like a tv show, and he was the good guy.  The bad guys were always trying to kidnap him, take his stuff, that sort of thing.  I don’t remember what was so important about him.  I remember some sort of tube, like a tube of chapstick but it wasn’t chapstick, that I hid in my back pocket at one point.  The bad guys were always doing something stupid to try to take the stuff, but they’d been getting progressively smarter.  When I hid the tube of stuff they were looking for, they kidnapped the hero and gave him some sort of virus.  We had to make an anti-virus.  I should also mention that the virus and anti-virus were both sentient, black blobs like on Spiderman.  Unlike Spiderman, the virus could not detach itself, it just moved like a blob until it entered the target’s system.  Same with the anti-virus, but it would not enter the first person it saw, it knew its target.  The virus had been dumped from a tube straight onto the hero so I don’t know if it had the same capabilities.

Anyway…. So, did I mention that Hillary Duff was one of the people in this group?  She was the hero’s girlfriend.  Now, when he was first infected, we didn’t know.  We tried to rescue him, but he was under the influence of the virus and attacked us.  Then I saw things from his point of view, and saw that, to him, everyone’s faces were distorted, like “trollface”.  (Actually, I think the whole scene reminds me more of the video for “Black River Killer” or possibly the gas from Batman Begins but the last time I saw it was a few years ago so I’m not sure.)  Also, whenever anyone spoke to him, it sounded like medieval English.  But, since people were speaking modern English, it did not translate directly to him, and was distorted, which is why he was unable to understand what his teammates were saying to him. It had sounded like something bad which is why he attacked him.  The scientist announced that he’d finished the anti-virus, and decided that Hillary should be the one to administer it to him.  (At this point, I was no longer seeing things from the hero’s view, but I was not in a body.)  Hillary puts on her sexiest dress and they put the blob anti-virus on her back (so he won’t see it…) and she runs off to find him.  When she’s about half way there, I tell her what I know about the middle English.  She panics and runs to find a book to teach her middle English so she can talk to him.  (I think I told her without having a body, yet she looked at me as if I was in a body… ??? Was I a ghost?  A god??  I don’t know.)  She thumbs through the book to get a quick idea of what she needs to say, but doesn’t have time to perfect it.  When she sees the guy, she tries to talk to him.  She fumbles some words, so he doesn’t completely trust her, but he doesn’t attack her either.  She tries to tell him that she loves him, which was apparently performed perfectly, because he let her kiss him.  She figures she’d best run with this as long as possible so she won’t mess up the talking, so she’s making out with him, but the sentient blob on her back is taking its sweet time reaching its target.  The hero finally gets suspicious and pushes away from her, before the blob gets to him.    I don’t really remember what happened after that, but I think that I helped her get a hold of him again, and this time the blob moved more quickly and he got the anti-virus.  Then he took care of the bad guys.  I watched the crew have a few more adventures, but the bad guys had turned seriously dumb again, so they were over quickly and they were not important.

Car Diary – Entry #1

I sit here in this quiet place watching the cars drive by.  Hard to understand how they can drive past this place of wonder and barely notice it.  I’ve always admired “little Stonehenge”, but this is the closest I’ve ever been to it.  It’s public property now, and they’ve built a park next to it, but I’ve no idea what they are using the old house and pavilion for.

Tonight, I’ve been thinking of my dream home.  A country house of dark wood, atop a tall hill or grassy mountain.  The front should have ample yard for the kids to play in, but then start to drop off or slope, with a view of the deep valley below.  The back side will have a screened porch, with built-in bench seats, and a door out on the side.  It will overlook a large lake, perhaps with a private pier, or at least a rowboat.  The forest should surround the lake, and creep up on the sides of the house, but it will not surround the front.  The driveway will most likely come up the back, near the lake but not too close.  Or maybe from the side, cutting through the forest.  Far side will be on a slope and the… [that’s the end of the entry.  I have no idea what I meant to write there.]


This was written sometime this spring.

Train Wreck Dream

Last night I dreamed that a train wrecked downtown, when I was on my way down there.  I don’t remember the exact numbers, but it was either on 11th or 13th street, and either 6th or 8th avenue.  I remember I was driving when I heard the sirens, but I couldn’t see where they were coming from, so I pulled into a gas station.  Turns out the Fire Department was right next the to gas station, both on the right side of the road, with the FD being first.  So I just pulled in really quick and waited for them to leave.  Then we all stood outside, talking and wondering what had happened, before someone finally heard that there was some sort of accident involving a train, and the location.  I remember asking if that was north or south, but no one knew.  Some people were worried because they had friends or relatives in the area so we started walking.  I was thinking about the people I was with.  I don’t remember how/when, but I had been watching them before, and judging them by how they dressed or acted.  One girl I thought was probably a snob because she dressed kind of high maintenance and was constantly texting.  She’s the one who stood out in my mind, but there were others I had considered to be more cold.  But as we were walking, and people were talking or otherwise revealing themselves, I noticed the softer side of these people, something I would not have noticed otherwise.  And still, it was inconsequential.  After the accident, we would all go our separate ways, and whether I knew them or not would not matter.  We finally saw a piece of the train wreck, but it was the main part of the accident.  Apparently, there had been some sort of explosion or malfunction either with the train or near the train.  The part we saw was after the fact.  Either the explosion had reverbed up to that part, or a car had hit it.  That’s when I woke up.

I had a dream earlier last night, and I’m not sure if it was part of the same dream, or a different one.  I was in my grandmother’s house, learning some sort of class.  The teacher was standing beside the glass door talking to us.  The door was completely clear, like it used to be.  Then she said something about maybe one of her old students was upset with her, because she had noticed someone lurking in the shadows outside the door.  I remember staring at the door until I made out the figure of a person who appeared to be squatting, and he had mohawk.  I thought it was my ex-husband, and maybe he had been spying on me, which was soon confirmed.  I wouldn’t let him in the house, and he got angry, but didn’t do anything.  Another of my ex’s, one who I am friends with, was also outside.  He acted nice and asked for something (I don’t remember what) so I let him in.  This made my ex-husband mad, but I still didn’t let him in.  He stayed outside, in the dark, plotting.

At some other point, either in this same dream or maybe another, I was walking to what was supposed to be my house, but it was in the country, way out in a field.  And before I got to the house, I heard people talking about fire.  The FD was already there, and trying to put it out, but some people were suggesting shovels to put dirt on the fire, so me and another person both grabbed shovels and headed that way.  The fire was in a little piece of the field behind and to the left of my house.  I had been coming to my house from the left of it, and when I saw it, I was a bit in front of it, and I only had to turn left to go to the fire.  My house was on top of a hill, and though I could see it, I was probably still about 5 minutes walking distance away from it.  I walked to the left, and as I started to go down hill, I could begin to see where the fire had been.  They had already dug some dirt to throw on it, in addition to spraying it, and the fire was already out.

recurring voice dream

Old woman gives me or sells me something which takes my voice.  I spend the whole dream trying to break the curse and get it back.

This time, it’s a little different because it cycles… and this time, I think I somehow get sent to the past, where I become the old woman who put a curse on me.

I don’t know what the object was the first time, but this time it was a bundle of sticks in a bag (art project).  At beginning of dream, was having another dream, where I was walking through a house from front to back, repeatedly.  Then Jimmy comes home and starts singing the Beatles song “Anytime at all/I’ll be there” (which was playing on my radio IRL).  He is trying to put the moves on me.  I play with him but then stop.  I try to say something to him, but I can’t.  Then it feels more like I can’t hear, rather than not being able to talk.  I try to turn the music down, but it doesn’t work.  My hearing keeps going in and out, sometimes completely replaced by a lack of sound, except for a ringing in my ears.  Jimmy can’t understand what I’m saying, but I don’t know if it’s because I can’t talk or he can’t hear me over the radio.  He seems to be only interested in the sex.  I keep toying with him, but I’m not sure why.  Maybe just because I’m horny.

Eventually, I walk outside, out the back, to get away from the noise.  Except even outside, my hearing doesn’t get any better.  I can’t hear the song, but I’ve got that ringing.  Then everything is fine and I go to the marketplace.  When I meet the old woman lying on the ground, it starts again.  That’s when I get stuck in the loop of going back in time, growing old, and starting the scenario over again.  Sometimes I can almost hear my own voice through the fog, when I’m screaming, but still, no one else seems able to understand me.  When I am the old woman lying on the ground, no one helps me, but they do harass me.  When I am the young girl, I keep thinking that I should find a way to help the old woman, to be kind to her, but she won’t have it.  As soon as she sees me, there is malice in her eyes, and the curse has begun anew, so I can’t talk to her.